In the beginning...

Once I realized.....
That has happened too many times too late. Shoulda turned left instead of right....Shouldn't have done this...Souldn't have done that. How did I end up here? Man, if only I'd...>fill in the blank<... How'd that happen?....
It never really ends tho', does it? I mean, I try and figure out all of the angles and ponder and theorize until my head is going explode and I still end up with a shoulda-woulda-coulda. What kind of crappy karma is this? I realize I'm not the most religous person around. Hell, there have been times when it's downright impossible for me to actually believe that there is some all-knowing being or thing that watches over all of us. I mean, come on. Right?
Maybe that's my problem? I don't know. In order to try and get a handle on all of this I try my best to follow some basic rules - just to keep from thinking it's all MY fault.

1. Be nice. Yeah, I know it sounds kinda corny. But mean people suck. Big time.
2. Be honest. I know damn well it's almost impossible, (...you look great!) but I do this for me. Helps me to sleep at night. "An honest man's pillow is his peace of mind"-JCM.
3. Do at least one good deed a day. Pick up a piece of trash, let somebody in front of you in bad traffic, tell someone they're important to you in some way.
4. Do no harm. If you can't say something nice..., pick up after yourself, don't litter.

No matter how many times I get kicked in the teeth for trying to live by these few simple rules, I end up coming to the same conclusion. If this is the best the the Entire Universe has then we deserve to go spinning off into the sun so that somebody else can start over. RE-DO! Come on people! Pollution, terrorism, wars, murder, greed, selfishness, corruption...yeah these are all fine traits for the top of the universal food-chain.

No, I'm not suicidal. I'm convinced that living a better life and outlasting those individuals is a much better solution. I'm just not doing a very good job at it. No good deed goes unpunished. It's like I've got bad karma following me where I did something really wrong as a kid that I don't remember and now I'm paying for it. Or maybe it's that Yin and Yan nonsense that seeks a universal balance for all things. You know, if some selfish, POS person that acts like a two-year old brat gets away with their crap, somebody else has gotta pay. And I pay alot.

But more on paying out the a** later...